How's that for a clickbait title? Give me money, internet.
I was putting myself in his shoes. Imagine having his connections, and understanding how executives think. Critical acclaim is nice, but not as nice as making forty million dollars. To have access to this system where you can just suck out piles of cash and spray it all over yourself and your friends, why wouldn't you? Normally, I'm a lot more down on obvious grift. That assumes, though, a victim. Imagine being fooled into thinking a movie where Rob Schneider barks and sniffs buttholes would be anything other than what it is; nobody is preyed upon here.
I actually saw The Animal recently, and I'll give it this; not as dire as I expected. Sometimes Happy Madison movies can have good moments purely by virtue of just having talented people fucking around. I wouldn't, say, recommend it, but I can see how it existed in the cinematic ecosystem of the time. Keep in mind this wasn't very long after Dude, where's my car? was in theatres and holy hell, I dare you to try and sit through that again.
Props to him, really. Skimming money off of this enormous machine that doesn't even mind, because you're ultimately bringing in more than you're taking. Then he bled it dry and jumped to Netflix! I can't imagine what kind of demographic data they have that told them this was a winning move, but I guess I'm not a big fancy data center analyst. I haven't watched Ridiculous 6, but I have to assume poop, fart, hit in balls and boner, etc. He got paid millions of dollars, and he got to ride around on horses for a few days! Wow!
Something that ties in with this is how there's a hidden value to garbage being churned out. Maybe The Simpsons is an echo of a shadow of a husk of a shell of what it once was, but it's padding up the resume of someone who might actually make something worth watching someday. I know that sounds like a make-work kind of idea, and it is. But maybe someone pays the bills by working on the lesser seasons of Archer while putting together their pitch. So for every Paul Blart I guess a bunch of camera operators don't stave for a while, right?
So yeah, if Adam Sandler came up to me and said "I'll give you a million dollars to write five screenplays out of whatever cherished creative ideas you're hanging on to, then I will make embarrassingly bad movies out of them", you're god damn right I'd happily squirt them out. A million dollars can go a long way towards blunting embarrassment.
Speaking of,
Not much conveyance of action, but I guess it's clear enough.
The guy having a huge hole in his head was an accident first, then I went with it.
Now this is an oldie, but it just so happens I pretty much got it how I wanted it the first time. The only big discrepancy is the obvious 90 degree rotation compared to the usual page, but I shouldn't be so rigid anyway.
